Last Comic Standing and other things that have happened lately...

The Last Comic Standing auditions were yesterday at ACME. I didn't try out because I only have approximately 15 minutes of material and being green doesn't act to one's advantage in a comedy contest. A lot of comedians slept overnight outside of ACME. I went to visit for a while and then left to go sleep in my warm, soft bed. I came back in the morning after my bio lab, toting a bagel and cream cheese and some hot coffee for Tommy, who had stayed up all night with the rest of the comics. As soon as I got there, I offered him my gift and he literally said "augh, no I can't eat that..." and turned away. I've been really frustrated with him lately - mostly his lack of grace and gratitude. It makes me not want to do anything for him. Anyway, that's off topic - Comedy is what we're here for, right?

At 10am yesterday morning there were about 200 people standing in line for auditions. Most of my friends were in the 20-50 range and did get to audition, but a lot of the people past 80 or so were turned down due to the time shortage and such. None of my close friends got into the showcase, step 2 to getting on to the actual show. A few acquaintances did, though - if you'll look to the left of your page, you'll see the name "Mary Mack" - she got in. Another woman named Shannan Paul got on and a guy named Joey I.L.O. I didn't go to the showcase last night, so I don't know who was picked to go to L.A. or wherever the next step is. Hopefully a few of my friends did.

Apparently Last Comic Standing is rigged like nobody's business. Certain comics with notable television or film appearances had the upper hand by getting appointments instead of having to stand in line. Others were automatically in the showcase or on the show. Some well known comics like Doug Benson and Jimmy Pardo auditioned or got on. I don't know what to think of that - these guys are making money hand over fist with television shows and specials and touring. Well, maybe not hand over fist, but they sure as hell don't *need* the opportunity to be on Last Comic Standing - if anything, I'd think it would take them back a few steps in their comedy careers. In anycase, it was fun to hang out and see all the comedians in one place for a little while. The poor comics who didn't get into the showcase were mocked or verbally beaten to a bloody pulp by that asswipe "Ant". Apparently he's trying to be the "Simon" of the show. I don't understand how or why they picked the judges they did for this season. Alonzo Bodden - a former contestant on LCS, Kathleen Madigan - again, a former contestant on LCS and a fairly decent female comedienne, and Ant - Goddamn Ant - the least funny "comedian" on the face of the planet. He was also on one of the previous seasons of LCS and he hosts "Celebrity Fitness Challenge" or whatever the hell it's called. He's got no right to tell comedians what's funny, seeing as he's not really a comedian. So I guess the only thing you get from being on LCS is to be a judge on LCS... It makes me mad how unfair it is. Comedy is unfair all around, though.

In other news, I went to the Zach Galifianakis show on Saturday night at the Pantages. Greg Fitzsimmons and Lynn Shawcroft opened the show. It was the first comedy show I've seen in a big auditorium like that, usually it's at smaller clubs. It was shorter than I expected it to be, but it was amazing all around - at least Zach was - Greg and Lynn were okay but nothing to write home about. We wound up at ACME after the show where Greg was headlining (he did 3 shows in one night, shazzam!). Mr. Galifianakis was there too. I was too nervous to say anything to him until later, but Lynn walked right up to Tommy and I and started eating our fries and talking about Mitch Hedberg. We had an awkward heart to heart with her for a few minutes while she munched on our food, she offered us drinks but we refused and then she walked away. Later that night, I was "talking shop" with Greg when Lynn rolls around, drunk as a skunk, wailing about Mitch and worrying that nobody liked him. She was having some problems that night I think. Again, later - I got Zach's autograph and joked around with him for a while but the comic I talked to the most was Greg - he even showed Tommy and I naked pictures of his wife. Awkward, but sort of flattering to think that he's comfortable enough or he likes us enough to show us that stuff.

In anycase, it was a decent week comedy-wise. I haven't done it in about 2 weeks, I should get on that. Maybe tonight or tomorrow. Definitely signing up on Monday.

This is a long long post so no funny videos or pictures today, kids, sorry.

Atomic Blom(berg)out.